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Tag: BringBackOurGirls

General Elections 2015: Preliminary Geo-Political Permutations

Nigerians are permanently fired up when it is election time; at least the majority. They know election is the best tool to rid themselves of failed governments and particularly politicians who promised what they cannot fulfill. This is exactly the reason why they do not take it lightly when it is election time. They know it is their only chance to try again.

There are those among them who collect money for their vote and vote the other way, and some vote the party who bribed them. Nigeria’s electorate is one dynamic phenomenon that must be understood. There are times they even vote to make a statement- think of Ekiti. Apparently, those on ground knew something was not alright with Dr. Fayemi’s approach to governance. Governor Fayose was not the best hand on offer on election day, but Dr. Fayemi was neither a of messianic material, so he was let to fall. Fayose cruised to victory carried on the back of the people, plus supported by President Jonathan’s band of army and police officers. Shared rice or similar incentives are of secondary relevance in this matter. After all, both camps shared rice.

In the ongoing campaign for the presidency, the voice of the people cannot be mistaken. It is clearly a total NO to a government with no clear-cut approach to anything. Truth be told, President Jonathan has no agenda at all. He is only interested in sitting out his terms of office. Everything about him is a confirmation of this fact. The people do not want him. If they really wanted General Buhari is a different matter entirely. President Jonathan’s grave incompetence is the best reason to replace him, even if with a carbon-copy of himself, so far it is not a return of the original person!

Lets get real for once, the supporters of the incumbent are not doing so based on the quality he has to offer. Not all at. I agree with Mr. Olumhense’s submission on the matter- awon-ajegundujera i.e. profiters of/from Jonathan’s ultra-corrupt government are the only elements in that camp. Add to that, many stand with him notwithstanding his enormous failure based on personal principles, herein comes the eyele-principle very handy to describe their plight. This proverbial faithful bird will not desert his master no matter what. Think of Dr. Abati and the picture is perfect. I respect this careless choice. But I respect Nigeria and care about her way too far. Another group of teeming supporters are the PDP-remnants, the die-hard core PDP-ers. PDP is way too strong to not have this kind of fight-till-death-membership. All these people shall vote the PDP and Jonathan in February. Are they enough to win him the presidency? Capital NO.

Lets permutate geopolitically: The Southwest is securely in Asiwaju Tinubu’s pocket. APC shall win with a landslide in the Southwest. The mood right now is comparable to 1999 when Alliance for Democracy (AD) won nearly all seats leaving remnants for the PDP. If you don’t believe me, ask the person beside you to wake you up to reality.

The Southwest as a voting bloc has a history of voting and sticking together. Call it anything, this is who they are. At the moment, this geopolitical zone is best insulted when a party throws Jonathan at them for another four years. They voted, on Tinubu’s prompt, overwhemingly for Jonathan, not PDP, in the 2011 election. The incumbent did not deserve a return because he failed woefully. Add to that, this strongest political voice at the moment, upon whose body language Jonathan was elected, is no more in doubt that Jonathan is a big shame. In short, Jonathan and PDP’s political death are surer than night and day in the Southwest, at least till 2019.

PDP shall win minimal votes in the North. The North has three geopolitical zones. These zones shall vote overwhemingly for General Buhari. The reasons are far too obvious to be debated. Think of General Buhari coming from Katsina (Northeast). Jonathan only helps the ease of deciding finally for Buhari in that part of the country with his failed attempts to secure the freedom of the stolen girls, fight Boko Haram and stop the bombings threatening to destabilize the fragile peace in the states. We must not forget also that Kogi and Kwara, two states in Northcentral are most likely to vote along the Southwest bloc. The likelihood of a landslide victory for APC in the North is at an all-time high. Political betters who bet on General Buhari in the North may start counting their political chickens.

The Southsouth is presently not in Jonathan’s grip alone. Not only Rotimi Amaechi, but far too many politicians in the region envy the incumbent. And they do not hide their beef for him. Yes, beef is allowed in politics! And by the way, is there anyone, who is not beefing President Jonathan at the moment? Even his staunchest supporters are in short supply of good reasons for their support. So, while one may want to call the Southsouth for the president already if PDP’s rigging-machineries worked well enough, there are far too many hands that will ensure APC won the zone. Mind you, among APC’s sponsors and moneybags are riggers per excellence! This geopolitical zone shall be hotly contended and the smartest will carry the day.

The sway-geopolitical zone, i.e. Southeast shall be won on a state by state basis. No bad-belle intended, but these states shall politically sell their votes to the highest bidder. Selling in this light does not involve money changing hands alone. Mark the qualifying adverb- politically! The idea is, since the Igbo will have neither the predidency nor vice, they will vote the party likely to give them better representation at the centre, plus improve the lot of the region via investments in infrastructures. Jonathan promised the Southeasterners too many things in 2011. That he practically spat in their face by not keeping the promises is a fact. Religion will play a decisive role in this part of the country, no doubt. However, this will be minimal. It is not going to be as decisive as in 2011. Plus there are indications the zone shall likely pay Jonathan back in his own coin, i.e. spit back at him in the face! Rev. Father Mbaka’s sermon is a wake-up call to reality.

Away from geopolitics, lets round-up on Jonathan’s campaign team. Two extremes in the team shall busy us shortly as jaara in this piece.

Chief Anenih, the cunniest and election-rigger-in-chief has met a match bigger than him in Chief Tinubu and APC combined. Sam-Ndah Isaiah’s piece on Chief Anenih is a worthy piece about a dishonourable end. A good slogan sums up the beautiful article: May our end not be like Chief Anenih and may we know when to die politically in peace!

Zeroing in on the most unfortunate choice in the team, Femi Fani-Kayode. That he made the team confirms the incumbent’s desperation. Fani-Kayode is a bastard, in that he has ruined all political goodwill of his father. I am sure Chief Fani-Kayode of blessed memory is weeping in the grave-beyond for his son’s political gone-haywire-lifestyle. Femi successfully destroyed whatever is politically left of the goodhouse he came from. He is presently a political-no-weight and thief. Here are two prayer-slogans derivable from Fani-Kayode: May we never be accursed with children like Femi Fani-Kayode’s directionless waywardness! And may fate not make us fathers of political longthroat and potential prisoner!

I will not pity Femi if after PDP’s loss, Jonathan or Madam Patience decided to sue Femi for campaign fraud. Plus his EFFC file reactivated, there shall be no escaping prison for Femi Fani-Kayode. His crying way too loud and acceptance to lead Jonathan’s assault are his last hope before a sure political-death. Chief Obasanjo knew him well. Hear OBJ: Femi is my boy, he will do anything once you give him food (paraphrased). Fact is: Femi Fani-Kayode has never won an election and is no strategist. His political greenhornery plus naivity far outweigh that of Ribadu.

So, why and how did President Jonathan end up in the hands of two counrtywide political thief and pretender? The answer is the mirror: The president is best advised to get one for himself!

Spoken-Word Artists and Academics In Germany Demand: BringBackOurGirls!



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It is obvious that the last is yet to be heard of our lost girls in Nigeria. Apparently, the Federal Government believes the shout and demand to bring back our stolen girls would die-out somehow, but how wrong the Federal Goverment is! The world will not keep quiet until our girls are brought back. The recent Malala visit to Nigeria on the issue of the girls testifies to this determination of world citizens to rescue our girls.

Here is the latest: Recently at the BIGSAS festival of African and African-diasporic literature/photograph Mbuguah Goro, held in Germany, poets, spoken word artists and academics lent their voices to the Bring Back our Girls’ campaign. Some of the  artists and poets that supported the campaign were the American spoken word artist, RonAmber Deloney, German poet, Temye Tesfu, Kenyan writer, Tony Mochama and some lecturers and students at the University of Bayreuth. Photography

The Proverbial Crocodile and A Crooked Dame: On a Scale of Sincerity!

Undoubtedly, the latest display by Nigeria’s First Lady is in a class of its own, if considered in light of her usual comedy-like theatrical appearances in time past. For those who know her, this is enough to spur them to practically jump into the internet for a glimpse of her unique First-Ladyship! Seriously, an attempt to characterize this latest with words might be a challenge too daunting for literature!

If anyone is yet to see Dame Patience’s recent act, imagination will certainly not disappoint such fellow just at first guess what manner of episode she must have delivered. I recommend very quickly a google-search. They certainly would not want to miss Dame Patience performance!

For a better grasp, this is what happened: The First Lady practically broke down while she addressed a meeting she called to talk about the over 200 missing schoolgirls in Nigeria. A tissue was at hand to quickly salvage the situation. She at once removed her eyeglasses to wipe clean her tears!

It must not be left unsaid that her voice grew louder and wilder with every shout she made. Apparently in a move to emphasize her sorrow and state of bewilderment! After all, these were over 200 girl-children missing! Her Excellency is a mother (the First Mother!) and was once a girl!

Not to forget, also involved in this problem is Dame Patience’s husband, whose job and government’s integrity are at stake! The burden on the president’s shoulder at the moment could not have been better put on display in practical terms than the increased cleft of the First Lady’s voice while she delivered an episode that was not much different from a cast-down soul bewailing a loss too great to bear! Who would want to or could come to terms with such loss!

Voices were heard, apparently from those present uttering words of comfort. They must have been caught off-guard with the seemingly frustrated and broken First Lady. They forgot that this is a person whose emotional stability might not be medically unquestionable going by her various appearances since her assumption of Nigeria’s First-Ladyship!

In any case, it need be said without mincing words that saving the wailing of Her Excellency, no tear was sighted. It will certainly have been to her better advantage if she had made a successful attempt at shedding the proverbial crocodile tears, and ensuring for the sake of the media, that the *proverbial crocodile tears* were sighted before being wiped off with the tissue offered her!

Notwithstanding this little mishap in execution of the soap-opera-like short comedy, the goal of the short prop was achieved.

As a matter of fact, the handlers of the First Lady, particularly those who authored this theatre of the absurd must be commended for a well-done job. They have once again exploited fully the Femme fatal personality/unusual-woman-power character of the First Lady, and that very successfully. The emotion-prone First Lady was very useful for the singular purpose at hand, namely, diversion away from the heated polity of the moment. The comedic tint for which the First Lady is known was also a tool in this regard.

Come to think of it, it is over two weeks since the uneventful abduction of the schoolgirls, the cluelessness of the presidency has only gotten worse by the day, and the military is not any better in combating the insurgency. Conflicting statements from the presidency and the military on the (un-)successful release of (some) girls and consequent withdrawal or re-framing of the wordings of the press release could only worsen the predicament of the Jonathan Presidency. In a time of total loss within the rank and file of the presidency over the handling of the kidnapped girls, which is fast becoming a problem that cannot be ignored for the government, the First Lady’s show of shame came in very handy, a sort of temporary relief and a tool to weep up sentimental support for the president’s unfortunately helpless situation.

Apart from the diversionary purpose, her appearance is also a continuation of the blame-game. It is very convenient to shove fingers in the other direction to underline one’s innocence. One can be sure the handlers of the First Lady have since returned to their kitchen-laboratory to cook up yet another episode of the never-will-end-comedy-pack!

While this latest faux-pax is making rounds on various social media and has become a subject of serious discussion among the intellectuals, the First Lady had in actual fact reached her targeted audience with the kind of message she wanted to pass across! In fact, the higher viewership the video gets, the faster she reaches her desired group of Nigerians.

It should be noted that the audience of the First Lady is neither the (highly/superbly) educated social media users nor the better-informed citizenry like readers of this piece! I am certain many in this category were *pissed* as it is evident on various social media platforms and from comments and op-eds. These (well-informed) Nigerians are angered!

Has it ever occurred to anyone to ask if the First Lady cares about these Nigerians of good taste? To say the truth, she does not *give a damn* (if I may borrow that from President Jonathan’s vocabulary chart!). Her targeted audience is the easily bought-over type. This audience will/can much identify with her predicament. I refer to them as the *Put-Yourself-In-The-First-Lady-Shoes-Category*. This is one typical excuse which sells well among the fan-base of Her Excellency.

Their argument is this:
If I were the First Lady, I would have done same or worse to protect my husband’s interest!
This is a job that feed the family!
I am the First Lady! I would do anything to keep my husband on the job o!

These Nigerians would shout you down if you happen to attempt to talk them back into common-sense regarding the urgency of the task at stake. Were they alone, which meant, they happen to be thinking alone, it would take them lesser time to convince themselves that the First Lady had done the right thing! Therefore, she must be right! Other self-convincing thoughts might follow. Before long, the president is forgiven and all his transgressions are blurted out. He is now being looked at with a flowery eye-spectacles on!

With reference to the proverbial crocodile and the First Lady, the former would be better placed if sincerity is a yardstick. Come to think of it, the crocodile shed the proverbial tears, not because the animal willed it into existence. To the crocodile, the shed tears is an unavoidable means to an end in that they were unavoidably shed! How else could she (the crocodile) have been able to crush the bones in her meal but to let the tears flow freely!

Now, fact is, the other of the pair, namely the First Lady, she had long figured out she was going to cry in that piece she acted. She knew what to do and how to go about effectively timing when she would break down! She could as well have started crying before the meeting began, but she did not! She held back her tears for the camera. She could as well resolve to a daily dose of wailing and tear-shedding to underline the genuineness of intention! No, she did and would not! Really, the First Lady would have won me over if she could show she had not slept since the girls were kidnapped or that she has not stopped crying and wailing since after that scam and sham of a meeting ended!

Further on the duo, apart from the sincerity of intention for which the crocodile is the better and sincere of the two, both of them clearly enjoyed the shed-tears. The shed-tears for the crocodile is a confirmation of how much she enjoys the food being crushed/eaten. The pleasure the crocodile derives from her tears can and is only comprehensible when described in orgasmic terms! If she could laugh and cry aloud, she could have done so to underline how pleased she is for a good meal!

Take it or leave it, like the crocodile and her tears, the First Lady did enjoy that show of shame she put up for the camera. Her brokenness is insincere. Readers should view it in this light: What exactly is the purpose of the meeting? Did she seriously mean to discuss the missing girls? Did she really have any reasonable solution or suggestion at hand, which she has since not discussed privately with her husband? Let us be clear: The First Lady’s pretended brokenness is a farce. I hope the Nigerian public is far better informed to be taken in by this farcical show of emotion which is best described as fraudulent emotional trickery.

Seriously speaking, one would do well not to discuss this First Lady at all, because she is a very unfortunate happening to Nigeria and a real waste of precious time! One is best advised to follow the Nobel Laureate’s wisdom when asked by Christiane Amanpour of CNN for his opinion of Nigeria’s First Lady.

Prof. Wole Soyinka aptly responded: That one that calls herself the First Lady of Nigeria, I don’t want to talk about her!

I second the Nobel Laureate.

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